dressing for success (or, the converse-wearing executive director)

on the my first day of work at my current job, my male supervisor suggested that i "dress to the level i want to be promoted to," meaning that if i'd like to be executive director one day, i should start donning the clothes of a would-be director right now. while i appreciated his input (he was genuinely trying to help), this advice absolutely horrified me. to dress in that way would be so counterintuitive for me in more ways than one.

i admittedly have a big problem dressing "like a grown up." i tend to like to think that clothes don't matter much in my life, yet i firmly believe i would work happier and more effectively if wearing clothes that i feel comfortable wearing. i wonder what impact this thinking has had/will have on my career.

looking back, my attitude toward clothing has shifted with the passage of time. as a child of the eighties, i looked to pop culture rather than my elementary school teaching mom for fashion inspiration. i expected to spend my grown up years wearing tight minidresses and heels on a daily basis and was somewhat excited about that prospect.

now fast forward ten years to high school, when i was a thrift store-shopping bargain hunter with a passion for funky old finds. although i wore a uniform to my all-girl catholic high school, i had a penchant for fifties and sixties dresses which i seemingly had no occasion to wear. (my friends and i would wear these to rock shows around L.A. or alcohol-free parties at our parents' homes.) at that tender age, it was important for my clothes to proclaim to the world that i was an individual and not a cookie-cutter clone.

ten years later, i find myself feeling indifferent when it comes to fashion. i have little to no interest in fashion trends and don't really read mainstream women's magazines, so i don't know what's supposedly in or out, nor do i particularly care. yeah, i still like cute clothes, but i also still feel foolish spending more than $30 on any one item. (plus, there are more important things happening in the world, and thus, more important things to spend money on. funds would be put to better use on responsible philanthropy than a $500 purse!) i feel that my clothes are one part of my identity that gives people clues to who i am, but there are loads of other ways to find out, like, say, talking to me. furthermore, i'm getting less and less inclined to care about strangers getting to know me through my damn clothes. (if someone wants to be my friend, they've got to like a lot more about me than whatever piece of fabric i decide to throw on that day!)

still, getting back to the original thought-- whether i like it or not, i must acknowledge that the clothes i wear send a message, especially in my professional life. naomi wolf's beauty myth mentions studies illustrating the fact that women who wore power suits or professional uniforms to work tended to be taken more seriously than those who didn't. my big problem is accepting that fact. are work dress codes a necessary evil of professional life? i am responsible, capable and qualified, so why can't i be taken seriously wearing jeans and a pair of converse to work? why can't our society move PAST clothing and other aspects of our appearance to seek out the substance beneath them?! until we do, we'll always be forced to conform to superficial standards. as a nonconformist, i just can't help feeling confined by dress codes. still, i comply whenever necessary, despite the nagging feeling that i'm "faking it" all workday long.

i have been wanting to write about my relationship with my clothes for a while, so thanks to noelle for reminding me! this is my first stab at getting some of these thoughts down, and i hope to expand on this more later.

what's your relationship with your clothes like?