women hold virtually all the key leadership positions at my workplace.
as i consider my career options and the possibility of grad school, i have to imagine what my future life could be like if i get my wish for a successful career in the museum biz. the only tricky thing is, when i take a hard look at the women at my workplace who do hold these leadership positions, sometimes it makes me reconsider and reevaluate my definition of success. is it's naive for me to believe that it's truly possible to have it all-- both a satisfying career and a happy personal life, the ultimate goals to which i've been working towards? could i be happy if having a secure professional life meant sacrificing my desire for kids? could i feel complete with a long-term partner/husband but no job? if i HAD to pick just one, which would it be? i hope for the best, but am unsure how these sometimes conflicting elements will reconcile themselves.
i'm not afraid of success. i don't shy away from challenges. i just want to be realistic when i think about what i'm working towards.
i think about how much time women in management roles spend at work or on the road, away from family and other loved ones, those who, in my opinion, make life worth living. if i ever have kids, i don't want to be the absentee mom-- the one who never goes to school events, only spends 5 hrs/week with her kids, devotes the bulk of her life to work, and has a nanny or family member do the real mothering. same goes for quality time with a partner or spouse. at the same time, i'm definitely not cut out for the role of full-time homemaker/wife. it's very important to me to always be financially independent. in general, i do enjoy working and participating in a world outside of my own personal bubble.
i was raised by a single mother, who managed to successfully be a financially responsible, devoted parent. because she was a teacher who worked similar hours to my school schedule, i never felt like i was lacking parental attention/affection. growing up in that atmosphere, i never realized the delicate and difficult balance that often exists when women juggle their personal and professional commitments.
here's an excerpt from a related björk article from 2005. she was 39 at the time of the interview, which was conducted shortly after the birth of her baby w/ matthew barney-
She's open about the problems of balancing family and work. 'It's incredible how nature sets females up to take care of people, and yet it is tricky for them to take care of themselves.' Slightly to her astonishment she is becoming interested in women's rights. Because of her mother's own militancy - 'she wouldn't enter the kitchen, I mean come on' - she reacted the other way, adoring housework, knitting and sewing.
But recently, 'I have been noticing how much harder it is for me and my girlfriends to juggle things than it is for men. In the 1990s, there was a lot of optimism: we thought we'd finally sorted out equal rights for men and women ... and then suddenly it just crashed. I think this is my first time in all the hundreds of interviews I've done, that I've actually jumped on the feminist bandwagon. In the past I always wanted to change the subject. But I think now it's time to bring up all these issues. I wish it wasn't, but I'll do it, I'm up for doing the dirty work!'
Will it inspire new songs? 'It's definitely brewing inside me. Maybe if Medulla was my personal, idiosyncratic statement about politics, whatever I do next is going to be my eccentric view of feminism. It's like any major upheaval, whether it's the revolution in France or punk for me in the 1970s, you break up all the corruption and fuck up all the bad things, so you can start really fresh. But it's the law of nature that it all settles again, so you have to keep checking yourself. You can't ever say, "OK, we sorted out corruption and everyone is equal." So I might become a feminist in my old age!'
Born Björk Gudmundsdottir in Reykjavik in 1965, she grew up in a hippy commune with her mother and stepfather, a blues musician. 'I was brought up feeling that my mother had sacrificed herself for me. Fortunately she's now got a little business doing homeopathy from home, but she's almost 60. I'm still desperate to get over that sense of guilt. I don't want my baby to feel that.'
1 comment:
I totally feel you Simone! The same thoughts run through my head. With grad school, I have decided that my lofty dreams of one day running a nonprofit now don't seem so appealing to me. I would much rather be a director or manager and not an Executive Director. 2 years ago our 2nd in command at the office left to spend more time with her two young children and she warned of how difficult it is. But I am hopeful that the workplace is getting more flexible and sensitive to these issues. I guess the big thing is finding that right employer and sticking with it. Oh and being good at drawing the line between work and play. Easier said then done. Big props to your mom! I am also thankful that my parents were able to be home by 5pm and have dinner on the table by 6pm. Damn how did they do it?
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